Oh Darling, It’s The Apocalypse! / 1.3 – Military / “A Tale of Two Sinks”

Get ready kids, because 1.3 is finally out!! Officially finished my first year of university, and I’ve only had three or four or fifteen breakdowns. Thanks everyone for your patience Smile Fun update: I’m officially four lifts away from completing the apocalypse!

Scribbled out to avoid spoilers! Winking smile Although I’m fairly certain literally no-one will be able to remember what happened in these chapters by the time I get all the way to the end.

Anyway, moving on!

Last time on ODITA: Francine lifted Culinary and Hopelessness and married Scott, who is going to lift Military. They continued making bad chess puns. I continued to google different chess puns.
& I never showed you Scott’s everyday wear – so, let’s go!

We got the cursed apocalypse jodhpurs!! Sad smile Scott, you’re looking really comfy there.

Scott: “This smile is hiding the chafing pain I am getting from these riding boots.”

Welcome to the apocalypse: you will suffer here.

Scott: “It’s okay, I would do anything for Francine, my Queen…”

Do you guys ever like, check yourself before you make terrible chess flirts? Or no?

Scott: “Check… as in… checkmate?”

Scott: “We checkmate often Winking smile “

Why do I do this to myself

Scott: “So my Queen… this is what you ate for so long without me?”

Francine: “I know! I think I’ve found every single way to cook a hotdog. Boiled, grilled, frozen and then flash heated, toileted…”

Scott: “What does… what does toileted mean?”

Francine: “ Smile ”

Scott: “Did… did you toilet these hotdogs?”

Francine: “ Smile Smile Smile “

The apocalypse does strange things to people.

Anyway, Scott got a job in Military. He didn’t get level 8 like Francine, but Elite Forces is high enough. It is why this chapter is a lot longer than Francine’s though!

Wow, I was going to write really horrible chess-related dirty talk, but that joke is so tired now.

Francine: “Oh, Scott! You really put the mate in checkma-“

I’m going to have to stop you there Francine.

Thank you for your co-operation.

First baby Darling is on the way though!

We also take this opportunity to build Francine a fancy new kitchen! Yay Francine! Congrats on getting a proper oven!

Hmm, I guess they don’t really feel about talking about ovens right now. This is a sweet picture though and I just wanted to share it Smile

Francine: “Oh, Scott! Roses are red, violets are blue, I was so lonely without you!”

Cringe. But they’re both so in love it’s really sweet! They’re always flirting with each other and following each other around the apocashack. ❤

In this picture: me stopping paying attention to my sims results in two rule breaks in one second. Francine can’t cook thermidor until Oceanography is lifted and Scott can’t juggle until Entertainment is lifted. So consider this me repenting for my sims’ sins lmao. I did stop them both after I took the picture. RIP that thermidor though I bet it was going to be delicious.

Francine: “Oh, god. I shouldn’t have eaten the poisoned lobster.”

Hey, I did try to stop you! It bloated you and made you worship the porcelain throne.

Francine: “Ugh. I hope this doesn’t make me go bald like that one waitress from last chapter.”

You’ll be fine. *cough cough*

The following day was mostly just work, honestly.

We got visited by Ani-Mei again, though! Hi Ani-Mei! How’s life? Smile

Z!Ani-Mei: “Well, I’ve successfully zombified several townies. That’s pretty cool.”

Congratulations, who’s winning the ‘zombify the most townies’ competition right now?

Z!Ani-Mei: “Me, obviously. Reigning Zombification Champion Z!Ani-Mei, at your service!”

So… why are you at the Darling lot and not zombifying townies?

Z!Ani-Mei: “Well, me and the other simselves have a pool running… first person to zombify a Darling gets the whole lot.”

Wow! Would you look at that! It’s time for you to go!

Z!Ani-Mei: “Look, I just want to say hi to Francine… that’s all.”

SHOO!

Z!Ani-Mei: “Damn it.”

With Z!Ani-Mei gone, we can say hi to the first new Darling! Congrats on the bump, Francine! ❤

Francine: “I am visibly shocked by this!”

I can tell!

Hey, Scott. Your wife is pregnant.

Scott: “That’s fantastic! Soon we will have our first pawn! Also, I am taking Francine through the zombie infested streets on a road trip.”

WHY.

Scott: “I need to visit my work lot as per the rules, and someone forgot to send me!”

Damn, you’re right. FINE. But if you run into a simself, run.

Scott: “Why’s that?”

I mean, they’re zombies, but they also very specifically want to eat your brains.

Scott: “Ah, that’ll be why.”

Great, you’re here! Now, time to g-

Z!Shan (shannonagins on Boolprop): “Is that… Darlings I smell?”

NO! NO IT ISN’T! TIME TO GO, KIDS.

Thankfully, Francine and Scott got home safely. Francine was just really hungry. Dude, you have a full plate of pancakes right there.

Francine: “I know! This milk is my starter, plus the cayenne peppers and the ketchup.”

…Why?

Francine: “Cravings are the worst.”

Apparently they are. Fun fact: Francine on free will ONLY EVER made pancakes during this pregnancy. I just thought you guys would appreciate this fact.

And whilst Francine was dealing with cravings, Scott was working on his #body. Lookin’ good, Scott!

Scott: *flex* *flex*

…Scott?

Scott: *INTENSE FLEX*

Well, whatever makes you happy.

All that intense flexing seemed to work though, and Scott got another promotion! Yay! One step closer Smile

Whoops. So anyway, I must have forgotten to screenshot the second bump. But here’s a picture of Francine giving birth!

This little fellow, with skin 2, Scott’s green eyes and Francine’s hair is Elijah. Hi Elijah!

Elijah: *blank baby stare*

He’s going to lift Medical. You can see the intelligence already.

Elijah: *blink*

Beautiful.

Francine: “Awww, welcome to hell little guy.”

❤ That’s how I’d want to be welcomed into the world.

Elijah’s baby years passed quickly, and as you can see, the Darlings have another little’un on the way! Happy birthday Elijah, please be cute. Or have nice hair. Either of these preceding statements. Ideally both.

Oh.

OH.

O H.

Well, damn.

See what I mean when this was going to be a great plotty apocalypse. Aplotalypse, if you will. I EVEN HAD THIS SEPIA TONED EDIT READY TO GO.

Honestly, I just want to finish a challenge though so you guys are stuck with this. Maybe next time!

Anyway. Elijah isn’t that cute. Hopefully he’ll be the only one who has this mysterious plot-disease however.

Maybe he’ll… grow into it? :I Hi Elijah!! You’re still sweet because you’re Francine and Scott’s baby and I love them both!

Elijah: “It is okay, Great Annoyance-“

Wow, excuse you.

Elijah: “…I have accepted this as my fate. I will therefore endeavour to study medicine in order to prevent any future children from suffering from this mysterious unloaded mesh hair disease. It is so sad.”

Aren’t you, like, half a year old?

Elijah: “Yes, but an old soul… wizened by years in wait. I chose this difficult path and so I shall walk it.”

Man, Francine and Scott’ll have a field day with you when they find out about this.

Scott: “Okay, Elijah! Say ‘bear’!”

Elijah: “Boo… boo… ga!”

Scott: “No, ‘bear’!”

Elijah: “Boo…ga!!!”

You crafty bast*rd.

Elijah: “Boo-ga! Smile “

I’m watching you.

Francine: “Baby number two already?”

You have absolutely no time to waste my dear. You have 7 days left of adulthood, that’s two more babies after this one! Get on it! Open-mouthed smile

Bump #1!

And Scott’s on his way up! Not long to go now! Smile

Bump #2!

Francine: “Did I actually ever move from this spot?”

Well I mean, you went back into bed? But I promise this was taken on two separate days, even though it looks really suspicious ;n; I’m not a dirty cheater, speeding up a pregnancy is totally against the apocalypse spirit.

Francine: “…cheater? What does this mean? Can you cheat our reality? Is… reality… not real?”

Hey, what names are you considering for the new baby?

Francine: “Oh! Well if it’s a girl I was thinking…”

(Phew. Gotta nip those exsimstential crises in the bud asap.)

Here comes the new baby!

Elijah: “Yes, mother! Create my minion!”

You’re not old enough to have a minion.

Elijah: “Ahah! But you are wrong. I have summoned her from the netherworld in much the same way I too have arrived. She will assist me in my eventual goal of saving simanity from my disease…”

Elijah: “…by having the disease herself! Muahahahahahah!”

What? Oh no. Is this… is this… the dreaded first born syndrome?

Elijah: “MUAHAHAHAH!”

Why you gotta be an evil saviour of simanity?

Elijah: “BOOGA!”

>:C

Anyway, yes. This is Penelope.

Francine: “Wow, she really reminds me of someone!”

Tell me about it. She has first born syndrome. I know this from the rest of the pictures in this chapter. Sigh. Couldn’t have even gotten first born syndrome on a cute baby :,)

Elijah: “Excuse you, I will not take this insult to my adorableness!”

THIS IS YOUR FAULT ELIJAH.

Elijah: “HMPH.”

On a lighter note, look how lovely Francine’s potty training face is! ❤

Francine: “Man, you’d think pooping in a bowl was pretty easy.”

I know, right?

Elijah: “I am but a child and on this earthly plain my movements are limited by four poorly-construed limbs! In the netherworld, I can poop in not just bowls but also any other concave instrument I so desire! Even convex!”

Francine: “Aww, he’s trying to say my name! Smile It’s not “netherworld”, it’s mama!”

Well, at least she’s not having an exsimstential crisis.

Having successfully learned how to poop on this mortal plane, Elijah is growing up! Let’s see if he grows into those froggy eyes!

Elijah: “I will not take any more insults to my appearance! I am beautiful and simply want to save simani- ooh, pretty lights!”

Scott: “Happy birthday dear frogchild, happy birthday to youuuu~!”

Well. I’ve seen worse!

Elijah: “As you can tell, I am rather beautiful! I am simply a late bloomer!”

Would it make you feel better if I just marvelled in your brilliance from now on?

Elijah: “Ideally, yes.”

Of course, Sir Dr Elijah Darling of the Netherworld. Lift us from our chains and save us from our showerless world.

Elijah: “Perfectly executed, pleb!”

Elijah: “Do. Not. Say. A. Word.”

Oh, your majesty Sir Dr Elijah Darling of the Netherworld! You broke that sink so fantastically!

Elijah: “I will reach through your screen and you too will suffer as I have suffered.”

Of course, Sir Dr Elijah Darling of the Netherworld. I await your merciful and justified punishment for my trespasses.

Elijah: “I’m watching you.”

I’m watching you.

Elijah: “HMPH.”

Meanwhile, upstairs and completely oblivious are Scott and Francine

Scott: “Oh, my Queen! We have already two wonderful additions to our army, shall we add one more?”

Francine: “Oh, my King, I thought you would never ask!”

On second thought, I think I prefer talking to Elijah.

Hey, Elijah.

Elijah: “Use my full title.”

Hey, Sir Dr Elijah Darling of the Netherworld.

Elijah: “Yes, pleb?”

Did you know your parents used chess to make you? Smile

Elijah: “Wait… how?”

Well, when two adult sims love each other very, very mu-

Elijah: “OH NO. DO NOT PROCEED WITH THIS LINE OF DISCUSSION PLEB. I BEG OF YOU.”

…they have a very specia-

Elijah: “You know what? I don’t need logic skills anyway. I’m going to go wash my hands 10 times to remove my bodily stink. And you, pleb, are not invited!”

…That’s understandable.

Elijah: “I thought I’d said you weren’t invited!”

I know, but I needed a picture of the child stinky and washing their hands in the sink. It’s apocalypse tradition.

Elijah: “Curse your tradition!”

Hey, you gonna use that soap?

Elijah: “…Yes.”

Okay, just wanted to be sure! It removes bacteria! Very handy Smile

Elijah: “What’s your game plan?”

I don’t know, honestly. When I started writing this dialogue column it seemed a lot funnier in my head than on paper.

Elijah: “Ah, ‘tis the curse of us geniuses. Permanently thinking at a higher level than everyone else, and no-one will ever understand us…”

Aw, you called me a genius!

Elijah: “No! I never! You are but a pleb! A pleb!”

Awww, he likes me ❤

Elijah: “PLEB!”

Happy birthday Penelope! We know exactly what you’re going to look like but welcome to the world!

Penelope: “Brother… I am nearly ready to assist you.”

Elijah: “Good, good, Lady Penelope. Together, we will lead the charge into a bright and glorious future!”

Guys, you’re like 5. Calm down.

Elijah: “There will be those that oppose us… but ignore their hate. We will rise above.”

Penelope: “Of course, Elijah. Of course!”

I want to scream.

And no one is surprised haha. Checked their personalities to be certain and sure as anything, they both have the same personality points. Sigh.

Penelope: “Brother!”

Elijah: “Sister!”

Absolutely terrifying.

Elijah: “GREAT ANNOYANCE!”

LITTLE ANNOYANCE!

Elijah: “I SMELL! YOU MUST FIX THIS!”

Sorry lad, no can do. That’s down to you ❤

Elijah: “RIDICULOUS! JUST PLACE A SHOWER!”

Physically impossible my dude. Lift Medical, and then we’ll talk.

I always feel bad for child sims in the apocalypse, they can’t sponge bath and so they have to wash their hands unendingly. Never get the chance to just be kids and have fun, they’re just chained to the sink!

Elijah: “You put me through this.”

Hey, you’re the one who came from the netherworld, let’s not forget this.

Elijah: “HMPH!”

I forgot why I took this picture, but here’s a picture of Scott crying I guess.

Scott: “The wallpaper… is just… so… ugly!”

Ah, I see. I thought it was suitable for the apocalypse!

Scott: “The apocalypse… is just… so… ugly!”

I mean, that’s part of the vibe I guess. Sorry dude. Go lift Military and maybe your kids will see a prettier world ❤

How’s it goin’ Elijah?

Elijah: “This is my 14th handwashing today.”

Pretty tragic, eh.

Elijah: “It’s not just tragic, it’s SO INCONVENIENT! How can I take over the wor- I mean, save simanity, without access to a SHOWER!?”

I don’t know dude, maybe your plan to take over the world can happen after you study up to lift Medical?

Elijah: “You’re terrible. Pity me, pleb!”

Oh, Sir Dr Elijah Darling of the Netherworld, I do. I do.

Elijah: “Mother! Look! Is that a zombie!?”

Francine: “A… zombi- wait.”

Elijah: “I’m AFRAID, MOTHER!”

Francine: *narrows eyes* “I feel like you’re cheating, but as I’m your mother I feel obligated to check. Don’t you dare move a single piece.”

Elijah: “Why would I ever do that? Smile “

Scott got another promotion! Open-mouthed smile One step closer to lifting Military!

Of course, we have no time to waste! We have two more pregnancies max to get through before Francine becomes old and senile, so get to it kids!

Francine: “Great annoyance, you don’t need to tell us twice~”

Gross. And where’d you learn that!?

Scott: “Elijah is really such a creative kid!”

Francine: “Let’s make some more~”

Francine the family sim is obviously enjoying this more than she should. Anyway. Swiftly segueing away from this trashfire of a moodsetting conversation.

I actually forgot why I took this picture. I think Elijah got cold? I don’t know dudes.

Elijah: “How could you forget the circumstances which lead to this wonderful image of my perfect self!?”

I don’t know dude, you tell me.

Elijah: “As my entire dialogue is manufactured and created by you, I would argue that this is simply you telling yourself.”

Damn, that’s meta. You can tell he’s Francine’s kid.

Penelope! I totally forgot you existed!

Penelope: “Well I’ve been in the background, silently plotting and scheming. Perhaps I never wanted you to remember? Smile “

Right, that’s why. You’re a knock-off version of your brother.

Penelope: “But soon I will become the Almighty Law of This Land and you will fear the wrath of my gavel.”

Penelope will be lifting Law for us so we can move her and Elijah out as soon as possible ❤

Penelope: “And we will be able to operate unwatched…”

And unplayed.

I’m honestly amazed by how identical they look despite one being a boy and the other a girl.

Penelope: “Gender is manufactured by society.”

Oh, you right, sorry about that.

Penelope: “It’s okay, Elijah and I will help destroy those preconceptions when we take over the world.”

You know what? That’s actually pretty chill. If you need any help taking over the world, send me a message. I’ll lend a hand B)

Let’s play a game! Is this Elijah, or Penelope? Elijah, or Penelope? Elijah…….. or Penelope?

I’ll give you a second to think about it.

If you guessed Penelope……. congratulations! It’s Penelope! She was apparently really tired when I grew her up, oops.

Boom, here comes another pop! And yes, I rolled the pacifier dice this time. I don’t think I could handle a third Elijah clone.

Elijah: “Sister… he has foiled our plan.”

Penelope: “Brother, worry not. We will prevail nonetheless.”

Francine: “Hey, Scott, you ever worry about the kids?”

Scott (off-screen): “No, they seem perfectly normal!”

Francine: “Ah of course, silly me.”

Penelope: “Mama?”

Francine: “What’s up, Pen?”

Penelope: “Will this baby look like brother and I?”

Francine: “God, I hope not.”

Penelope: “What was that, mama?”

Francine: “Oh, nothing! Nothing! This baby has the same parents as you so it’s entirely possible! Smile “

Penelope: “Fantastic.”

Francine: “…Yes.”

Francine: “Doctor, my children terrify me!”

The Shrink: “Ah, yez. Zis is most common in apocalypzes. Fear not Franzina, change vill come.”

Important information: This is not all from the same aspiration failure. This is two different ones. Poor Francine, this pregnancy was particularly hard on her. I’m also terrible at fulfilling wants, apparently.

It also does not help at all when the two kids break every sink in the house. They’re constantly on the fritz. Case and point is above. I guarantee you that in 80% of the pictures included in this chapter that have a sink in them, that the sink will be broken.

Pop #2!

Sooo… what are you kids doing.

Elijah: “Chess.”

Penelope: “I’m beating brother!”

Just… playing chess? Not like, plotting world domination? Murder?

Elijah: “Just playing chess!”

…Wow.

Penelope: “And I move my tank-bishop to your footsoldier-pawn and CRUSH HIM.”

Ah, there we go.

Penelope: “It’s just chess, Great Annoyance! Smile “

I wish you guys would stop calling me that.

Elijah: “You’re the one typing it, pleb!”

Damn. You got me there.

So, this is illegal under the Athletics restrictions, and I promise I would have stopped it right away… if Penelope wasn’t swinging on the fence.

Penelope: “Yes! This is the best fencespinning ever!”

Scott: “You can fly, Penny!”

Penelope: “I can see the whole driveway from here!!!!”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7hmLC1aBASg Go here if you want to see this sweet, fence-swinging action in it’s full glory. Sorry, I couldn’t figure out how to embed it in my blog writer program!

And whilst Penelope is being swung on a fence, Francine is giving birth! How’s it going Francine?

Francine: “It really does NOT get easier the third time around.”

This is Jasper, and thank plumbob he isn’t a clone.

Francine has recessive red hair and blue eyes and I’m happy to see he inherited all of her recessives! Smile He also got her skin tone. What a pretty lad ❤

Penelope: “Brother, the new minion is not a clone… Report. Over.”

Elijah: “The plan has failed this time around, but my sources inform me of at least one more opportunity. We will have to be vigilant. Over.”

Perhaps Elijah’s failure to make Jasper a clone was due to him being distracted by his chess board! Wow! Congrats on reaching level 10 logic before even turning into a teen, Elijah.

Elijah: “It was natural to me, of course, as I am a genius.”

Of course, Elijah, of course.

And on that, here comes our first teen! Woo! No more confusion!

With his teendom, here’s Elijah’s personality points. Yep. And Penelope has exactly the same. 10 neat points and a whopping total of 1 nice point! Aren’t the Darlings just darling? Open-mouthed smile How do you feel, Elijah?

Elijah: “Like I want to learn everything… and that I really like fit people who wear jewellery. Also, I’d like my first kiss but only after I max my cleaning skill… Pleb.”

Penelope: “Brother, have you lost your lustre? Surprised smile “

Elijah: “No… certainly not… but I really want to kiss someone.”

Too bad Elijah. Maybe if you were the heir, but you’re not. Whoops.

Elijah: “Well, in that case I will have to redraft my plans to take over the world.”

Penelope: “Fantastic, brother. Let us begin…”

Sigh.

By the way, Scott is moving up the ranks really slowly but he is getting there! Which means this chapter is nearly over, oh no! :C

Also, Scott, you always bring Marisa home.

Scott: “Honestly? I think she follows me. I think she knows that because I’m part of the apocalypse family she can’t be zombified.”

Marisa: “ALL of my friends are zombies, Scott. ALL OF THEM. Damn simselves.”

If this wasn’t going to be a spoiler-y image, this would have totally been the chapter title, by the way.

Elijah: “Father, do you HAVE to wear those grey leotards?”

Scott: “Child, do you REALLY not appreciate these FINE glutes of mine? These will be yours some day too!”

Elijah: “Disgusting! I have cleaning skill to maximise.”

Scott: “How is he my kid again?”

Somehow, I blame Francine.

Francine (off-screen): “HEY!”

*cough cough* Maybe you shouldn’t have eaten the tainted lobster. Just a thought.

Four days left until Francine is old!! Get on it, kids! One more!

Francine: “Don’t need to ask me twice!”

I’m glad they’re still happy at least.

Elijah: “Maybe if I clean loud enough, I shan’t hear mother and father… cahooting.”

Hey, that’s how you were made.

Elijah: *LOUD AND DISTRESSED SCRUBBING*

Also, how cute is the fact that Elijah has the jumper version of his dad’s shirt! Aw ❤

Penelope: “Oh, look at papa! Papa, you’ve missed the bed! Silly papa!”

Scott: *literally collapsed from exhaustion*

Penelope: *raucous laughter*

Have I mentioned that Elijah and Penelope terrify me yet? Because they do.

Aw, look at Elijah! Stepping up as a big brother and taking Jasper to the cake.

Elijah: “You made me do this, Great Annoyance. This is your doing!”

Look, Francine is busy vomiting and Scott is collapsed in your bedroom. And SOMEONE had to do it, so it was you. Congratulations on being an adult.

Elijah: “I dislike this new sense of responsibility that comes with greater age >:c”

God, same, dude.

Omg! Jasper is adorable ❤ Hi Jasper!

Jasper: “Hi Jaspwer!”

Aww, what a sweety ❤

Jasper: “SWEET!”

Elijah: “What… what is this?”

Probably a child who wasn’t planning murder and world domination from the day he turned into a toddler.

Elijah: “Simply unnatural and unrealistic, what a convoluted writing technique.”

Jasper: *rubbing Elijah’s head* “Heheheheh.”

I love him.

Plus side to Elijah being a teen: I can make him look after the little kids. Additional plus side: his potty training face is amazing. He looks so annoyed.

Many bump pictures. Not a lot happened in between each bump – or at least not enough that I wanted to take pictures of it. I honestly can’t remember, it’s been a couple of months since these pictures were taken haha.

It’s Pen’s birthday today! Happy birthday Penelope! You can now also begrudgingly take care of your younger siblings!

Penelope: “Fantastic. I shall convert them to my ways.”

Yes… well, good luck with that.

Penelope: “Not to brag, brother, but I am totally willing to argue that I’m the best looking one, now!”

Elijah: “Ridiculous! We literally look exactly the same!”

Penelope: “And somehow, I still look better!”

Oooh, are some cracks forming in team frogchild?

Elijah: “Is that truly our teamname? Can it not be something cooler?”

Penelope: “Brother is right. May I recommend ‘Penelope and the Followers’?”

Elijah: *ANGER POSE*

Muahahahah. So it begins.

I forgot to take a picture of Penelope’s aspiration, but she’s a Fortune sim. I can’t remember her turn ons and offs, and they don’t matter anyway because she’s not heir either. Sorry Penny ❤

Penelope: “I hold no ill will to this decision.”

Elijah: “I might be holding some ill will to you.”

Penelope: “How could you? I’m perfect <3”

The birthday celebrations are then interrupted by Francine giving birth to her last kid! And it’s also the first time she’s given birth and Scott has actually been there, honestly.

This sweetie is Rosemary! She is also not a clone (Penelope: “Damn!”). Rosemary has s1 skin from Scott, red hair from both parents and is the only kid to get Francine’s lovely brown eyes! ❤

Rosemary: *baby noises*

Francine: “Please be a normal child. :,)”

This is a lovely picture! The whole family is skilling together! I feel like I had a wittier comment to put here but I can’t remember it, so just admire this cute family-ish shot.

Jasper’s birthday! ❤

Elijah: “Why is aging these children up suddenly my responsibility?”

Because I say so, now stop being a spoilsport and sing happy birthday.

Jasper: “Wowo! I have hands!”

Wowo?

Jasper: “WOWO!”

WOWO! How’s being older suit you Jasper?

Jasper: “Wowo, I love it! I can say weird words and have them be written down as words and not asterisk descriptions!”

Elijah: “Ahaha, there is hope for him yet.”

Jasper: “Wowo! Hi big brother! Hi little sister!”

Oh, baby. I want you to lift Intelligence but somehow I feel having a catchphrase won’t help you when you’re trying to allude detection.

Jasper: “Wowo?”

Wowo Sad smile

SOOO CLOSE.

Penelope never did max her logic skill as a child, but she’s caught up to her brother now as a teen!

And speaking about catching up…

You make a really pretty elder, Francine!

Francine: “And now best of all, I’m free to do whatever I want because I’m old!”

Damn straight, Francine. You exercise that free will.

Rosemary is growing up!

It’s okay. She grows into her face. She’s cute in her own way!

Rosemary: “CYUTE!”

Yes, cyute! I want Rosemary here to lift Education so we can get that every skill bookshelf. It will be so helpful.

Rosemary: “Educayshun?”

Yes, educayshun! Now go be adorable somewhere else out of shot whilst I figure out a personality for you.

Oh. Well. That’s. That’s not what I wanted to happen.

Penelope: “Oh look! Little sister has fainted! Brother, come see! This is FANTASTIC!”

Oh, Penny.

Ah yes. Well done Jasper. I guess you’ll grow up to be fantastic at sabotage.

This, by the way, was why I named this chapter ‘A tale of two sinks’. I somehow thought this screenshot was a lot earlier on than it was. Alas, the sinks weren’t the best choice of title here.

Jasper: “It’s okay! You still wrote a wowo chapter!”

Aw, thanks Jasp. Question: how do you pronounce wowo?

Jasper: “Wow-whoa, maybe?? When your entire dialogue is written down and not spoken, it makes definitive pronunciation very hard!”

…Yes, yes it does. Thanks Jasp.

Jasper: “Wowo! No problem! Open-mouthed smile “

…Who left Rosemary up here?

Penelope: “I don’t know! Maybe she’s just fantastic at climbing stairs? Smile “

PENNY. THERE’S NO FENCES UP HERE. SHE COULD JUST FALL OFF.

Penelope: “Oh… how unfortunate….”

PENELOPE. YOU CANNOT KILL YOUR SISTER.

Penelope: “I’ve done nothing! If she crawls off… well it’s her fault!”

Rosemary: “FAWLT! Open-mouthed smile “

Penelope: “See?”

Finally, finally, Scott has maxed his body skill so he can get those much needed last two promotions!! God, this chapter has been so long, but it’s nearly done! We’re in the home stretch!